Could You Be Denying Yourself The Most Important Thing In Life?
In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it’s easy to forget that one of the most important things in life is joy. We often find ourselves trapped in a cycle of self-denial, believing that choosing joy every day is selfish. This mindset can be especially prevalent among mothers, whose worth is frequently defined by how much and how well they serve others. But here’s a truth we all need to embrace: prioritizing joy is not selfish; it’s self-care, and it’s absolutely essential. You are not a selfish person for taking care of yourself, just a happier one.
In this article, I’ll explore the importance of choosing joy, especially for moms, and I hope to inspire you to shed any guilt that’s holding you back from embracing a joyful life.
The Divine Gift of Joy
In countless spiritual traditions and teachings, there is a common thread that runs through them all: the pursuit of happiness is not selfish; it is our sacred duty. We are not placed on this Earth to suffer needlessly. Instead, we are here to experience joy and love, to learn, grow, and share in the beauty of life.
If we reflect upon the nature of the universe, it becomes clear that joy is woven into the very fabric of creation. The colors of a sunset, the laughter of children, the fragrance of a blooming flower – these are all gifts of joy from above. It is our birthright to revel in these wonders, to find solace and delight in the small and great moments of life.
You Deserve Joy
As mothers, we often put the needs of our children, partners, and families ahead of our own. While this is a noble and loving endeavor, it can sometimes lead us to forget our own needs, including the need for joy. We mistakenly believe that we must sacrifice our desires and happiness for the well-being of others. However, it’s crucial to understand that denying ourselves joy doesn’t serve anyone in the long run. It can lead to burnout, resentment, and a diminished ability to provide the love and care our families need.
When you constantly deny yourself the things, experiences, people, food, and places that make you feel the most live, you’re sending a message out to the world, others and even to yourself that you don’t deserve a good life.
Understanding that joy is not a selfish pursuit but an essential part of a fulfilling life is the first step to reawakening your spirit. You deserve to be happy, just as much as anyone else. Embracing joy isn’t a zero-sum game; it doesn’t mean taking away from others. Instead, it empowers you to be a more loving and present mother, partner, and friend.
Embracing Your Spiritual Right to Joy
It’s crucial to understand that choosing joy is not at odds with your life’s purpose; in fact, it is a fundamental aspect of it. When you experience happiness, you align with your divine purpose and draw closer to your higher self. Here’s how you can embrace joy on your life’s journey.
Prioritize “Me Time”
Schedule moments for yourself each day. Whether it’s reading a book, meeting up with a friend, taking a relaxing bath, or practicing a hobby, these small acts of joy can go a long way in filling your life with happiness. If you find yourself wondering when was the last time you went out to do something you enjoy, it’s a clear sign you are not making the time to prioritize your happiness. Make time. We are all busy, but it’s the people who make enjoying their lives a priority who, in fact, enjoy their lives. Make a conscious effort to increase your joy in what ever ways you can. Be proactive in creating a life you love rather than suffering through the one you believe you’ve been dealt.
Embrace Your Passions
Remember the activities or hobbies you used to love as a child, or even before becoming a mom? Reconnect with them. Whether it’s painting, cycling, or playing an instrument, embracing your passions can bring immense joy. Scheduling in time for these hobbies may be hard in the beginning. You may feel that you have to prioritize your duties first. But the bills, the laundry and even the kids will still be there in an hour or two, needing your attention. Why not break away and do something just for the fun of it? The more you do it, the happier you will become and once you’ve filled your own cup, doing the dishes will be a breeze.
Connect with nature and beauty
Spend time outdoors and connect with nature. Go for a walk in the park, hike a trail, or simply sit in your garden. Nature has a remarkable way of grounding us and bringing joy. Take time to appreciate the beauty of the world around you. Whether in the form of nature, art, or the loving embrace of a friend, these experiences can infuse your life with joy and a sense of purpose.
Nurture Relationships
Remember that joy is not just for yourself; it is meant to be shared. Your happiness can uplift others and inspire them to seek their own joy. Joy is often found in the company of loved ones. Prioritize quality time with friends and family and ditch the complaining. Instead talk about the things that bring you joy, plan an exciting outing or just watch some comedy together and laugh. Positivity strengthens relationships.
Find Joy in the Everyday
Cultivate mindfulness by finding joy in simple, everyday moments. Savor a cup of tea, watch a beautiful sunrise, or spend time playing with your children – these are all sources of joy. A great way to get into the habit of this is though gratitude. Begin each day with a heart full of gratitude. Recognize the divine gifts in your life, no matter how small because we can all find hundreds of tiny things we are grateful for. In this recognition, you invite more joy into your life.
Shedding Guilt and Suffering
We have all messed up in life. And guess what, you will probably mess up again, many times. Mistakes are just a part of life. They are how we learn and grow. But dragging around guilt, shame and self-criticism does not serve any purpose but to diminish your inner light. Punishing yourself by denying yourself joy in order to atone for your mistakes does not make you a better person, just a sadder one. When you die, you will be given no awards for how much you have suffered. In fact, the idea that suffering is a virtue is a misunderstanding of many spiritual teachings. While life may bring its share of challenges, your divine purpose is not to suffer needlessly. In fact, the more joy you embrace, the better equipped you are to face life’s trials with grace and resilience.
It’s time to shed the guilt that has held you back from choosing joy. Forgive yourself and let go of the need to try and please everyone by being a martyr. You are not here to prove your worth through suffering. Instead, it is your purpose and divine right to live in joy and happiness and, in doing so, to become a beacon of light for others on their journey.
For all of us, but especially the moms
The joy you embrace is a gift to yourself, your loved ones, and the world. When you’re happy, you radiate positivity and inspire those around you. A joyful mother is a better mother. By choosing joy, you’re setting an example for your children, teaching them the value of self-care and happiness. You’re also creating a harmonious and loving environment for your family.
In the mystery of existence, the one thing that does make sense is the pursuit of joy. It is your divine right to be happy, to find joy in every moment, and to celebrate the profound beauty of life. Embrace joy unapologetically. As you nurture and share your joy, you not only uplift your own soul but those around you too, thereby contributing to the greater spiritual harmony of the world. Remember, you are here to find and share joy – it is your divine purpose.
For additional support and/or guidance on how to begin your postpartum wellness journey, reach out via email or social media anytime or checkout my 12-week signature postpartum wellness program, Mommy Makeover.
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